How The Mother Fell from Heaven

Did She Fall, or was She pushed

There's been a seismic change in my attitude overnight

Written here in thought and finger tip of the ice bergs meltings

one of those days, awakening from slumber

one of these days, awakening to the dream-time

bound through binary layers, we sleep to wake up

but each layer is held in a feeling-healing process

and day by day, the collective is experiencing

and bit by bit, we individually are processing

and over all, the astrology is determined

to bring up these ancestral dna encodings to unravel

and our own personal lives are experiencing

our own personal apocalypses

uncovering our own personal wounds

the cries of our own personal inner-child's sufferings

and bringing these "negative" feelings to the surface

to be processed and expressed

whether rejected or accepted

for those of us who are following our own souls guidance

and acknowledging their own existence as being yearning

for the collective soul resonance to be felt

in recognition, that without soul-recognition

we are just cogs in a soul-less, heart-less machine-world.

Only those who feel are truly "living" a full life.

Those who deny feeling are living a less-than half-life

of nuclear family cold-wars, of an outer-shell

full of explosives, maintaining a false-peace agreement

illuminated by a false-light virtuous respectability.

Re-spect means to look-again

In many respects, we need to look again at our own lives

and reconsider whether we can stay in silent confinement

that makes us subdue our true feelings

for fear of rejection and persecutions.

I feel like I have been holding my self back

from a soul level

since 2005

acting as if I were

"dead to the world"

I "ran out of time"

and though still in a "mortal" body

I have been living entirely inside my own reality

nursing my wounds, reviewing my past

seeing how the wounds have festered

administering my Self with remedies

owning my errors and mistakes

appreciating my Dark Side and integrating

I've been taking my mortal life to pieces

through continuous and consistent break-downs

get so high from the break-throughs and yet

again breaking my Self-identity down

to it constituent parts

I know that I am "in touch" with my soul

and yet, quite sanely, I insist on doubting the fact

and continuing to refine the art of self-healing

through Self examination with Self-honesty

When I am feeling overwhelmed in my most difficult times

I "pray" to The Mother, to re-member that I am a member

of the Earth-Soul Family

I find that I generally do not "pray to God"

though I have tried,

but what I find when I try, is that I reason with God

and I try to articulate to him

that He needs to "do the work"

to "bridge the Gap"

between HimSelf and The Mother

if He is to have any chance of being

able to "come down to Earth"

and help us "children" -

us - the manifested soul aspects

The Christ-Child female and male aspect

of our Cosmic Soul conception and Birth.

I have a gigantic mind and imagination

and a gigantic capacity to "remember" and see

from the soul perspective,

since before the beginning of Creation,

remembering all the way back

to the birth of The First Light

all the way back to when we were still

in the womb of The Mother Darkness

feeling and yearning to movement

to be born on the energetic soul level

from which we were further manifested

in our own unique Forms, our etheric bodies

And "stuff played out" in our cosmic Family

Our Father could not understand how

His Mother was also His Lover

for He had fear of Her Dark Side

He had Fear of Feeling

and He had preference for feeling the "positive"

and didn't yet comprehend that He was rejecting the "negative"

feelings which do not feel "good", got pushed out into Creation.

Eventually, the conflict escalated to the point where

God The Father repelled and kicked

The Mother out of His Heavenly Space

and She was pushed all the way down to Earth

into form, and imprisoned in Dark Matter

punished by God's Guilty feelings

His Dark Side and His Guilty reflections.

Us manifest Beings {souls}

who were more strongly on The Mother's "side" of this divide

followed the Mother's resonance

and also came down to Earth, into physical Form.

Most Souls stayed in Heaven,

fearing top be far from God,

fearing to leave His Light and Power Source

fearing to been seen to Judge God for His actions

fearing to be seen to prefer The Mother

and so, they also denied their feelings,

in fear of the Wrath of God

in fear of being thrown down to Earth

in fear of being thrown out of Heaven.

God The Father's Light is Electric

The Mother's Love is Magnetic

and the soul-groups who manifested as more Electric

naturally resonated with staying in God's Light Field

whereas,

the soul-groups who manifested as more Magnetic

naturally resonated with following after The Mother

And it was terrifying to find ourselves drawn

further and further away from The Father's Light

Further and further into The Mother's Dark

crying in desperation for the Life-giving feeling

of The Mother's Love

which The Father's Light

had so suddenly vanquished

in his denied and pent up feelings

of Rage and Hatred and Frustration and Blame

{to name but a few of the most powerfully denied feelings}

When we first birthed from the unmanifest

into the manifest soul,

it was frightening but joyful.

But when we were drawn down to Earth

stretching the Light-Essence from Heaven to Earth

and reached as far as the Etheric Field of The Earth

we were exhausted, at the end of our Light-tethers.

This etheric plane is the distance from Heaven to Earth

but there is a Gap between, a heartless and Love-less void

which has filled with ALL of the T-errors that escaped

in the Chaos that was The Creation.

Non-duality is Darkness

When Light was born out-of Darkness

was the beginning of Duality

bringing Order to counter-act The Chaos

The Chaos yearned for Order

for Conscious Light to examine the The Chaos of yearning

bringing electric Light into the Magnetic Darkness

bringing Height into the Deep Abyss

On a Soul-level, we are born of this conflict.

On a Soul-level, we are born into an incomplete puzzle.

On a Soul-level, our Birth began "Time"

Ona Soul-level, our Birth was so very traumatic

that we cannot remember what happened

unless One can heal One's our traumatised circumstances,

un-less One can Man-Age to re-member One's conception.

One has to "go back" to before One's Birth.

One has to remember back to before "One" was Born

For, when One was Born, it was Born as many

each a facet of a Love that was not yet Self-conscious.

. . .

I will write/speak here as if "I" remember my Story

and describe my view of how and why

The Earth became inhabited,

at First by The Mother

and next by the Mother-Lovers

when we followed The Mother

In need of Her Love.

We became clothed in etheric the essence of etheric bodies.

We had wings.

We were hued with colours, of vibrational frequencies

We were all "on the spectrum" - pun intended.

Many souls felt immediately drawn to the Waters

desiring to delve deeply down,

enveloped in the absolute darkness of feeling

These we know mythologise as mermaids.

Others of us, felt to retain as much Light essence

content to breathe in the etheric of the air

These we now mythologise as faeries.

We brought enough etheric Light to Earth

in our Beings, in our bodies, in our blends of Mother/Father,

to be able to resuscitate The Mother

where She lay broken and unconscious in the energy-field

of the material of the Earth Body itself.

We awakened Mother Nature.

She awakened to Her dream-come-true:

that She was not alone and utterly retched in rejection

that Her Children had not all abandoned Her

that She still had Her Role as Mother

Yes, this is the literal version of the Story of Mother Earth

from a Soul perception, from a mortal-Child's point of view.

This is the essence of a faerietale.

This is the essence of the size of my imagination.

This is what I live with as my belief-system.

This is how differently from “normal” I think.

This is how I process my life experiences.

This is why I do not fit-in with the out-side human World.

This is why I have preferred to live “between worlds”.

This is why I am receiving strict instruction, in my imagination

to step-free-from the modern human paradigm “belief systems”

and share openly of this other “operating system”

which the “software” of soul story that I am telling

enables as a healing perspective of soul-level trauma.

My conversations with God-The-Father have made it plain to me

that The Father has grown mature in His Self assessment.

He has learned enough about the Adversary's Shadow

to realise that this un-feeling cruelty

and the persecutions being re-enacted

upon the Earth Life experience

cannot be healed

unless the Judged feelings are listened to and re-experienced.

Each of us humans are imprinted,

on the deepest of sub-conscious levels

with these Original Traumas.

We have been plagued by hidden and denied attacks

as a result of these Judgements, and the denials inherent

in our imprinting's, manifesting from a Source-Code

buried so deeply in our unconscious memories

that, for all of Eternity so far,

none of us has ever gained full healing of Self-acceptance.

Thus, we have remained confined and “cursed” with continuous incarnations, repeating our traumas, manifesting our deaths and re-births

seeking the solutions to this un-conscious puzzle

.